8:58 am
I really can’t stop my truth-quest even if men I love would like me to.  I really MUST know what part of my painful seven years had to do with directed energy weapons.  I’d like to know which part was caused by disembodied spirits.  I’ve got to know if there is any difference.  AI is running humanity.  I can’t finish sentences.  The doctor decreased my meds so I’m not shaking as much but my memory is usually very dependable and I get flashes of fear that my mind is being destroyed.  BUT, God made a lot of minds before and he can remake mine.  That’s OK when I believe it.  Is my mind castrated merely chemically?  Or am I also being zapped about it?  When do I get to know the difference?   Why did so many of the artificial effects stop?  Because other ones worked better?  Or have I grown strong against some?  Where is God and why have I been permitted to suffer alone for seven years?  To be called a liar for seven years?  To be incarcerated just for speaking my truth and expecting my family to care and then being attacked and cut off from EVERYBODY?  I know God has a plan and purpose for every incident but I haven’t seen any.  Where’s my ‘utterly complete vindication’… and His? Cooke says there is no justice without vindication and I’m expecting justice.  Also God said I’d lead the  bride from government.  What’s that supposed to mean?  He said they don’t know who they are.  I’m in no position to tell them though.  I still can’t quite get it through my head about my own identity.  I belong to the King.  I pray for conclusion to this project.  I pray for destruction of directed-energy-abusing entities.  I pray for joy and His joy is our strength and if I wait for Him I’ll have strength which means I’ll be joyful, finally!  And  I’ll ‘mount up with wings as eagles’;  I’ll ‘run and not be weary, I’ll walk and not faint.’
9:00 am

How to “Beat” Narcissists

“You don’t ‘beat’ narcissism.  You overcome it by becoming something better.”
“They’re gonna BEAT you at control because they’re better than you.  They’re better at this stuff.  They intend to put you in a position where you have to fight.”
“If you do better, they’re gonna get worse; they’re gonna put you back in that lowly, hopeless, destitute, emotionally destitute situation.”

How To Outsmart A Narcissist The Right Way

“Wanting to outsmart a narcissist…I’ve never seen one person pull it off.”
They’d go down with you rather than let you get the upper hand.
“They stop at nothing…”
Massive ego…”if you beat me, I’m annihilated.”  Biggest ego wins.  No conscience so there’s no stopping him from having his way.  (I know this from watching my dad so I know I’ll never outsmart him.  God can though.)
“When we detach…This is all about finally being able to self-partner and come home in my own body and clean out my original traumas.”

Money’s most powerful ability is to allow bad people to continue doing bad things at the expense of those who don’t have it

Ready to join Skynet? All you need is a little pill.

Former DARPA director and now Google executive Regina Dugan is pushing an edible “authentication microchip” along with an electronic tattoo that can read your mind. No this isn’t a movie script about a futuristic scientific dictatorship, it’s trendy and cool!
RFID implanted Chip Kills you if you disobey
“Implanted human beings can be followed anywhere. Their brain functions can be remotely monitored by supercomputers and even altered through the changing of frequencies,” wrote Dr. Kilde. “Guinea pigs in secret experiments have included prisoners, soldiers, mental patients,handicapped children, deaf and blind people, homosexuals, single women, the elderly, school children, and any group of people considered “marginal” by the elite experimenters. The published experiences of prisoners in Utah State Prison, for example, are shocking to the conscience.

Attachment Trauma and Codependency-Why Do I Feel So Stuck

“When there’s an attachment trauma, when there is a problem with mother, perhaps God forbid our mother dies right after we are born, there is some kind of break in that sacred, sacred time…or if after this child is born, this mother is unable to connect to this child…we’re talking about attachment trauma…”
“Being connected to our mothers is absolutely CODED INTO US.”  “When we are unable to create those bonds with our mother we suffer attachment trauma.”
“A co-dependent is fueled by this innate push, this innate need to bond, to bond, to bond, to attach.  Co-dependents attach….They believe they need this being outside of them.”
“If you were God, why would you code a human being with this need to be seen?  who needs to be attached?”
When you think about it, I wouldn’t want… on any level… to be deemed ‘up-to-snuff’ by my family who rightfully reject me.  To be appropriate with them, is to default on Truth and to consider others’ opinions more important than even one’s own.  To fit in with an ‘appropriate’ family is to abandon one’s own conscience.  To follow a human’s wishes is to relinquish one’s own volition and responsibility.  To follow a psychopath seems the easy route.  A psychopath will anyway always point you in some direction.  Not all that glitters is gold.  Commenters are right to discredit religion. They are wrong to discredit the influence of supernatural beings.  We are all wrong to assume we’ve seen all there is to see.  We’re wrong to assume that others have not.  We’re wrong to assume at all in this period of time.  We can’t be surprised.  We must expect the unexpected.  “Wherever you see people killing one another…religion is involved.”
I’d like to do something about changing the world.  Somebody has to do it and Jesus might pick me.
9:47 am
Is this video of a TOMATO being sliced the ultimate cure for stress? Slow-motion clip of the fruit being cut up in reverse goes viral as viewers claim it helps them to ‘relax’

The Narcissist Psychology of Demons

“They’re only programmed to obtain their own objectives.   They are incapable of learning empathy or reason.  You can’t argue with a narcissist.   You can’t reason with a narcissist.  A narcissist doesn’t stop.  It won’t stop coming until you either remove yourself from the situation, or until that narcissist is no longer on the earth anymore.”
“There’s something wired wrong in their heads.  Their objective is always about control and abuse and getting their way.”
“Remember what you’re dealing with.”
“If the narcissist hasn’t obtained its objective it’s impossible to shut down.”

Revealed Project Blue Beam: Those who still possessed a conscience and a sense of humanity.

“Several examples will demonstrate areas in which progress have been made. The transference of energy from one organism to another; the ability to heal or cause disease to be transmitted over a distance, thus inducing illness or death from no apparent cause; telepathic behavior modification which includes the ability to induce hypnotic states up to a distance of 1,000 kilometers have been reported.

The use of telepathic hypnosis also holds great potential. This capability could allow agents to be deeply planted with no conscious knowledge of their programming. In movie terms, the Manchurian Candidate lives, and does not even require a telephone call. 

Michael Dukakis, the Democrat candidate running against George Bush in the 1988 election was targeted with microwave technology in order to impede his public speaking performance once the public opinion polls showed he posed a serious threat to Bush’s election prospects. He also claims that the equipment was used against Kitty Dukakis and drove her to the brink of suicide.
“If it is possible to feed artificial thought into the multigenic field via satellite, the mind control of the entire planet is now possible.An individual’s only resistance would be to constantly question the motivation behind their thoughts and not act upon thoughts which they consider to be outside their own ideological, religious and moral boundaries.’”
See more at:

The Use of Manchurian Mind-Controlled Subjects to Disrupt Trump’s Political Events

“Oh I know, that many will think that this is Tin-Foil-Hat territory. That is, until people actually bother to take the time to examine the existing academic research and publications on the topic of mind control.”

See at:   
We’ve got to get away.  We must get away.
I don’t own any green clothing so I suppose I should stay inside today.
I forget things all the time.  I forget lots of things lately because I’m on this medication, but I’m also naturally prone to forget things about God.  I forget that just when I have no hope…like now…then he intervenes and I repent for doubting him.  I’m always so GLAD TO SEE HIM!  Again, I’m waiting for God.  God shows up so naturally and smooth.  Sometimes you don’t even know what he’s done.  Miracles are natural and I’ve been waiting for mine since 2009 when my dad called me dangerous and abducted my sons and began his [more-major) SMEAR CAMPAIGN against me and my family.  (My reputation has not improved and I’m exceedingly lonely.  I don’t see my parents though,  and that’s tremendously helpful.  I should have gone no-contact years ago.  Instead I was waiting by the telephone– so I could jump when either parent wanted a favor like piano playing or writing a document nobody else could pull off.  These parents are false and being around them harms me.  It harms other people too but those people are so impressed by sparklies that they don’t ever look to what kind of people my parents actually are:  they’re not actually Christian.  (I’d have a hard time calling myself a Christian most days.)  God said he’s never late.  God said LOTS OF THINGS the hearing of for  which I am ACCUSED A LIAR AND REPROBATE.  Isaac hears from God so he doesn’t say I do not.  He suffices to say that I ‘have’ heard and that I have not.  Quite true.  BUT.  I HAVE heard from God and no matter how hard it was to believe that fact this morning when I could find no relief for my brain, I have HEARD FROM GOD.  I will not say I’ve always been RIGHT about what I heard.  Also HEAVEN KNOWS it is VERY DIFFICULT, when one is hearing from God and also from directed energy weapons…to know WHICH IS GOD.  I like to hear God because for one thing, he’s always RIGHT.  Also, I love to hear his voice so this differentiation is VERY IMPORTANT TO ME and I will know what God said.  That’s the only part I even care about.  My government is RAPING MINDS AND SELLING SOULS (See Revelation            I will be on the right side of history because I choose to KNOW TRUTH.  Baptists should consider the consequences of choosing lies…especially if they haven’t even considered the difference between the two.
“…and really, it’s a narcissist.  It’s a losing battle because you can never please him in the long run.  And he’ll never appreciate what all the beautiful things you’ve said and done and all the helping them and nurturing and the generosity of spirit and all the acts of service.  It doesn’t matter…because they can’t receive it; they can’t take it in.”

NARCISSISTIC RELATIONSHIPS: When Is Rejection Really Divine Protection?

“Unconditional love does not mean sticking around for disappointment, and does not mean sticking around for sarcasm, and put-downs, and gaslighting…”

Narcissism In a Single Word

“How could there possibly be hope?  The only ones that loved me, with the exception of my son, have abandoned me, for no good reason, for the sake of money, for the sake of just being mean.”
“Just about every single day I see that there’s some hope.  Now why was I fighting that therapist?”
“I was so depressed; I was fighting that not only was there no hope for me, but there was no hope for any mankind.  And if you let yourself go you can really see how that has some truth to it.”
“Any twinkle of hope in my eye, I could look back and specifically remember…that look they gave me when they tried to squash that little twinkle of hope.  I can remember the pleasure that the narcissist gained when they felt they were diminishing my hope.”
“If you can’t see it now, act as if there is hope, just to get you through the time.”
“The more you’re away from the narcissist, the longer you go no-contact from the narcissist, every second, every minute, every hour, and every day, that hope will be built up.  You’ll start seeing it.  You’ll start actually recognizing it as hope.”
7:24 am
It is now LEGAL for our government to torture and kill us.  (See: NDAA)  Our government IS NOW torturing and killing citizens.
 LOTS of TARGETED INDIVIDUALS are telling their tales but even if anybody cared enough to look at my evidence there isn’t a court in the land with authority to pass righteous judgment. I see more stories every day about people whose lives have been JUST LIKE MINE.  Electronic mind control is the fact of our existence, and no matter whether it further separates me from my brethren...I WILL STRIVE FOR TRUTH AND REALITY.  Jesus is Truth.  I was a fearful person so I prayed VERY STRENUOUSLY that when these current times came upon us, and when all humanity is subject to the predicted great delusion, “Please Lord,” (I prayed) “do not allow me to be deceived.  Give me courage and grace to face Truth under every circumstance.  I want Truth because I want You.”  Then I began to believe different things.  The Holy Spirit ‘leads us into all truth’ so I’ve gotta believe that’s what’s happened with me.
What Happened to Eileen?


Short story about being victimized. By Wendy Newman.
See booklet at:
Misdiagnosed Patients: Weapons Causing Hallucinations

A global group claiming to be “targeted” by advanced electronic weaponry, chemical attacks and gassings steadfastly continues to reach out to their representatives, law enforcement agencies, media and the public in general.  (and FAMILY and CHRISTIANS…)

Refusing to quit often in the face of being labeled “mentally ill”, these people often are stronger than anyone might imagine and more determined than most people on earth. They have to be. 

Learning about other people’s suffering mental torture from their online searches, victims of strange technology have formed support groups and meet on a regular basis around the country and outside of the U.S.

Labeling themselves “targeted individuals” or Tis for short, these people spur each other on, telling their stories and sending letters to representatives. A few have gotten interviewed in the media and a few have published books about advanced technologies making guinea pigs out of involuntary public citizens.

See more at:   

Congressional Investigation Called For To Stop Energy Based Torture Of Citizens

Citizens across the United States and abroad have long complained of being “attacked” with voice weapons that impose strange “voices” into and around their skulls. As yet, these people are usually dismissed as being schizophrenic, and directed to be psychiatrically assessed. Police and social workers may be called to make the initial assessments, transporting these people to psychiatric units where many are held involuntarily for 72 hours, sometimes known as “pink slipping”.

Social connections are often changed once a person has been pink slipped. The patients are given a lower standing in society so that if they talk about having strange things happen to them such as hearing voices they are often disbelieved by family and the rest of society for reasons of being “mentally unstable” or for being “unable to face their mental illness”.

As more of these people explain their experiences online and become friends with other people having similar experiences, information is being shared about weapons that can actually cause these “symptoms” to occur.

See more at:

Law Enforcement Turn to NSA Surveillance Data to Track Crime: “It Was Only A Matter of Time”

Read more: WHAT REALLY HAPPENED | The History The US Government HOPES You Never Learn! http://whatreallyhappened.com/#ixzz42yUewiZO

“It is not crazy to assess news events to see if they’re real or not real.”

Naomi Wolfe

Believe in Conspiracies? You Must Have A Mind of Your Own – The David Icke Videocast

“Challenging the soviet state they had to be crazy; they had to be mad.”
“That is what infests and infects so much of what we call academia…”  
“They ask questions, not to follow truth…but because they have an agenda of skepticism.  The arrogance of ignorance.”

Overcoming Anxiety & Fear – Steve Long (Sunday, 13 Mar 2016)

I wish I could get some good Christian ministry like in Toronto.

If liberty means anything at all, it means the right to tell people what they do not want to hear. (George Orwell)
Read more at: http://www.brainyquote.com/quotes/authors/g/george_orwell_3.html
As I write, highly civilized human beings are flying overhead, trying to kill me. (George Orwell)
Read more at: http://www.brainyquote.com/quotes/authors/g/george_orwell_4.html

Experts Warn Artificial Intelligence Is Overpowering Humans

AlphaGo’s triumph “shows that the methods we do have are even more powerful than we first thought,” said AI expert Stuart Russell of the University of California’s Berkeley Electrical Engineering & Computer Sciences department.

“The fact that AI methods are progressing much faster than expected makes the question of the long-term outcome more urgent,” he told AFP by email.

See more at:   


Kalamazoo shootings suspect told police Uber app controlled him ‘like A.I.’

According to the arresting officer’s report (view here), Dalton said when he logged onto the Uber app it “started making him be like a puppet.” He told police he would have tried to have a “shootout with police, when the log in went from the black symbol back to the red, that’s when Dalton stopped his thought.”

“Dalton explained to us that when the app changed from red to black that is when he started having problems.”

Dalton described ‘devil figure’ in Uber app

He told police during a series of interviews “the iPhone could take you over.” He said he “wishes he would never have spoken what that symbol was when he saw it on his phone.”

See more at:   


“I think the great danger of the future is that we will have roboticized human beings who are not aware they have been roboticized.”  (Dr. Jose Delgado.  Mind-control researcher.)

CIA Project Pandora Radio Remote Brain Manipulation

Codependency-Learning To Own Our Part In The Dynamic

Do you do things for others?  or rather to feed a need in yourself?  
Are you manipulating a sense of validation from others.  Failing that, play the victim.  
I’m on my fourth day fasting, and I just celebrated five months since I stopped smoking cigarettes.  
Science and technology have given us marvels, but without the balance of wisdom and emotional health, we get what we have now: rigid scientific dogma more like a religion than a system of inquiry, a slow march toward transhumanism (the integration of man and machine), and a hierarchical society hell bent on total control.

Why The Drug War Is Dangerous For Human Evolution

There’s open water, here and there; I wonder if I’ll go on an outing today, to Lake Michigan or poking around some river.  The Prophet knows where holy water runs out of the ground.  Father Marquette drank that water they say. The Prophet had five surgeries last year.  Now he’s making artwork to finance a road trip of undetermined length.  I should actually bite the bullet and ask him to take me foraging.  He says I can make pieces to sell, and he says we’d have enough money.  I don’t belong with him though, and with me along he’d have a much harder time finding somebody who does.  I don’t want to go to a treatment center; I’m not the slightest bit irresponsible.  I’m studying about CPTSD and narcissistic abuse syndrome and I’m getting well.  I just want something interesting to do and a friend…and the house DAD OWES ME.  I’d like to stay in Toronto for a while and Josh and I could get used to city-life together for a bit.  We both long for bigger lives but we’re also half nervous about them.  I’d like to not worry about money until I’m steadier.  I really don’t like being on welfare after having worked so hard for so many years.  Guess God knows what he’s doing.  I’d like to be able to present Isaac a plan for me so he could think about his dad and his brother.  He’s had has hands full since my credibility was slain.  I suffer from ‘self-love deficit disorder’ and the longer my family refuses to talk to me the healthier I get.  But, delay isn’t as good for them so I hope they’ll make amends soon.


8:12 pm

7:30 pm there was a bunch of helicopters circling the place very low.  I’ve never seen that out here before.  Maybe my dad’s going to be arrested pretty soon.   Helicopters are REALLY loud.