3/4/16
7:11 pm
“I offer my opponents a bargain: if they will stop telling lies about us, I will stop telling the truth about them.” — Adlai Stevenson, 1952

Read more: WHAT REALLY HAPPENED | The History The US Government HOPES You Never Learn! http://whatreallyhappened.com/#ixzz4231JmEmi

12:19 pm
Isaac creates lifestyle design.
“Freedom cultured…Cultured freedom.”
“The whole idea is that we can design a lifestyle,  rather than accept whatever lifestyle was put in front of you.
“In a sense, I’m just building a cult.”  Isaac, the just.
“We lay groundwork for the tribe.  We free their time from the pursuit of money.”
“Give them a plan to finance their dreams and free their time from the pursuit of money.”
To change your life you have to change who you communicate with and then socially  networking.
“Hope.”   “Bring spirit back into our lives.  through art music movement and inspired action.  Show the world what it means to be alive.  A place for people to live and breathe outside the matrix.
3/3/16
My dad’s birthday.  So far I’m not tempering anybody’s chocolate.
8:05 am
I don’t want to be the stupid loser child anymore and I demand an audience with my family who have ignored me ever since Dad lied about me and abducted my sons in 2009.  I DEMAND an audience.  You Goldthorpe people are so chicken-shit that I should actually stop hyper-ventilating already.  I am very near expiration.  I am tortured and I can’t fight with my mind all day every day; I NEED a vacation.  I don’t want to die, and I don’t think I will.  But I’m very seriously looking for an escape which I experience EVERY TIME I LEAVE THE AREA…but my rich dad who TRIED TO KILL ME…won’t help me get to.  I am most troubled and I don’t hear from God like I did before medication.  I’m very unhappy.  My Christian family will not speak to me.  This fact has been noted for a lot of years.  I will see justice.  My family will very soon have no choice but to acknowledge some things about our world.  I’m going to enjoy being right in public.  Narcissists DO NOT PERMIT THAT FAVOR.   Not ever.
You know what man cannot be entirely bad?  A man who hates war.  That’s a fact.  A man who does not send his son as a gladiator for godless empire.  That man cannot be entirely bad.   They say the single most important issue leading to recovery from narcissistic abuse is having a relationship.  You must have somebody who loves you in order to heal.  My sons love me now.  I didn’t have anybody before.  Love requires TRUST.  Dad destroyed all my trust, inside and out.  Jesus is giving it back.  He’s also restoring my modesty and making me a lady again so I can hold my head up in the community.  He said so, back when we were talking.  I felt my sons’ love when they picked me up from the psych ward.  I think they thought I might be angry about being locked up.  It was obviously God’s will,  and  I’ve enjoyed spending time with my sons.  Part of me is very happy.  Maybe this is dissociation-reassociationing?   Maybe I’m beginning to feel my self’s feelings.  I guess that’s got to happen at some point.  I’m feeling things and they aren’t all nice.  I wonder if God taught me enough about dealing with myself that I can feel things without struggling with my response.  I wonder if I can feel things and retain control by the Holy Spirit and not get resentful.  One of the nurses took me aside and asked about how I didn’t get agitated at some of the stuff going down. She asked, “You don’t get very agitated about things, do you?” That statement is evidence of my sanity if not hers.  Lots of professionals  God used to make me that way but this week has been very anxious.  Isaac said, after we picked him up at the airport and experienced a number of minor catastrophes, “Mom, I want you to know that I’ve noticed this streak of bad luck you’re having…”  That was helpful.

Fukushima: They’ve Killed Us All

Not only do we have those tapes of what happened to us, those ah-hah moments…but NEW TAPES that we create ourselves.  THIS IS COMPLEX PTSD.  George is being really supportive and supportive.  It feels really amazing.  He hugs me sometimes regarding some …

“I offer my opponents a bargain: if they will stop telling lies about us, I will stop telling the truth about them.” — Adlai Stevenson, 1952

Read more: WHAT REALLY HAPPENED | The History The US Government HOPES You Never Learn! http://whatreallyhappened.com/#ixzz4231JmEmi

I was a law school officer in the Rutherford Institute many years ago; I even attended their ‘President’s Conference’.  I’ve sent letters to Mr. Whitehead,  requesting an audience with a person who might CARE ABOUT ELECTRONIC TORTURE OF INNOCENT AMERICANS.

I’ve sent dozens of letters to people who know I speak THE TRUTH.

He didn’t write back.  Nobody ever writes back.

John W. Whitehead

The Age of Authoritarianism (and How to Combat it)

John W. Whitehead speaking with brilliant James Corbett.
Defense against the dark side of the women they will meet.  Their mom won’t ever stop learning.

3/2/16
BUMP TO THE TOP, from 12/30/14:
As a formerly Baptist woman I intentionally embraced the relinquishment of my personal power.  I fought (you gotta believe, for me it was battle…) to submit to my men.  I thought this was OWED to THEM.  I was mistaken; all submission is OWED only to God, and by submitting to often-psychopathic behaviors, I was feeding the beast.  I wasn’t nourishing my men’s better angels, I was rewarding selfish manipulation.  I was casting pearls before swine.  Maybe God didn’t make a mistake when he gave brains to women.  Maybe that’s why he gave men two heads: their brains would rattle around too much in the big one.
How can there even be a 104 year-old neuroscientist?   For all physical purposes, I remain in the world my dad established for me, the world where nobody cares what I think.  Some people at sundry times have asked and/or paid me to do some of their thinking for them.  What’s a girl to do?  I recognize that my life is not my own, and God will use it as he sees fit.  He’s seen fit to demonstrate to me that he is always right.  He’ll be right about my life too. But, I’m really bored and lonely.  Also I’m disappointed in my compatriots; doesn’t anybody want an adventure? This is the final battle between good and evil and we get to choose our own country.  Also, I shouldn’t judge my own work-product.  I want somebody to argue with.
I was trying to think of a non-pejorative linguistic, a female-archetype for spiritual growth and/or positive aging. No smart woman is a good woman it seems, at least not in English.  Witch.  Crone.  There also is no language of archetypal female aspirations, no “hard-ons” no “limp dicks.”  No recognition of any universal influence of females, by passion or principle.  Expectations monitor female behavior, within various sub-groups.  Peer-pressure, criticism, one-ups-man-ship…yet no female-specific vernacular of the experience.  I’m tired of thinking about my Dad and the on-going effects of his lies and cowardice.  I hope God lets me free to think about some other things pretty soon.  I’d like to study languages.  I’d like to study the brain-scans taken while I was praying in tongues.  Wouldn’t that be interesting to see?  Maybe my dad knows where they are.
Were we ever middle class?  It seemed so, for a couple years between milk goats and politics.  We thought, for an instant, about “getting ahead” rather than “playing catch-up.”  We couldn’t afford this house and I told my dad so, at the time and ever since.  
There are a number of ways one recognizes that one’s thought-process has been usurped.  This is known as a ‘spiritual attack’ and they have persisted since way before the technology we blame for them.  You know when you hear words you didn’t think; but that’s actually VERY rare.  Usually the evil entities just make you KNOW a thing.  Anytime you’re absolutely certain you KNOW…you gotta recheck the cards.  Demons and social media intend to make us absorb messages while believing that the messages actually began in our own minds.  We really have to know the content of our minds and the Bible said this is so.
“It’s too hard to believe really.  It sounds like something out of a psychological thriller…”

You Must Experience Narcissists to Understand Them

List of TARGETED INDIVIDUALS that died recently

1) Ron Gilman of California of Youtube, FFCH w/interviews on Coast to Coast,

2) Scott Fulbright of S.C. both TIs.

then a 3rd… a female who’s name escapes me right now. Sorry.

And 4 more

The list of TIs that died recently below, any info on dates of their passing or on TIs who have passed away that aren’t on my list would be appreciated…

R.i.p to the following TIs who recently died:

  1. Alyssa Orr: https://www.facebook.com/alyssa.orr?fref=ts
  2. Alex Foster: https://www.facebook.com/profile.php…
  3. Jacqueline Feli Roche: https://www.facebook.com/jacquelinefeli.roche?ref=br_rs
  4. kelly Caslar: https://www.facebook.com/photo.php?fbid=1100838269957181&set=p.1100838269957181&type=3

11:27 am

There are a number of ways one recognizes that one’s thought-process has been usurped.  This is known as a ‘spiritual attack’ and they have persisted since way before the technology we blame for them.  You know when you hear words you didn’t think; but that’s actually VERY rare.  Usually the evil entities just make you KNOW a thing.  Anytime you’re absolutely certain you KNOW…you gotta recheck the cards.  Demons and social media intend to make us absorb messages while believing that the messages actually began in our own minds.  We really have to know the content of our minds and the Bible said this is so.
“It’s too hard to believe really.  It sounds like something out of a psychological thriller…”

You Must Experience Narcissists to Understand Them

List of TARGETED INDIVIDUALS that died recently

1) Ron Gilman of California of Youtube, FFCH w/interviews on Coast to Coast,

2) Scott Fulbright of S.C. both TIs.

then a 3rd… a female who’s name escapes me right now. Sorry.

And 4 more

The list of TIs that died recently below, any info on dates of their passing or on TIs who have passed away that aren’t on my list would be appreciated…

R.i.p to the following TIs who recently died:

  1. Alyssa Orr: https://www.facebook.com/alyssa.orr?fref=ts
  2. Alex Foster: https://www.facebook.com/profile.php…
  3. Jacqueline Feli Roche: https://www.facebook.com/jacquelinefeli.roche?ref=br_rs
  4. kelly Caslar: https://www.facebook.com/photo.php?fbid=1100838269957181&set=p.1100838269957181&type=3

10:23 am

It occurs to me that I haven’t actually written much about the psych ward, and the Smithsonian exhibit will want all the details.  Isaac loves word-play.  He freestyle raps.  He also writes funny raps embracing references to all of Sean Connery’s movies and delivers it in Sean Connery’s voice.  At one point the Sean tells Eminem he should come be his caddy and Isaac and Josh were considering whether Marshall would think it was funny or if he’d pull a gun.  You can’t ever be too careful with a guy who has two names.  I’ve maintained a friendship from the psych ward; I was supposed to drive her to Ann Arbor for an appointment, and her man.  I had to back out because that old beater my dad gave me won’t always start and I was apologizing my ass off.  I was so distraught and my friend from the unit said, “Life happens.  I wouldn’t want to get down there and have the car die.”  I was startled at such majestic logic.  I stammered, “Oh.  I forgot you’re a grown-up.”  She actually sounded like she knew what I meant by that.  My family of origin was NEVER and IS NOT NOW…anything like adult.  She was a pole dancer and taught me how to walk like a stripper.  Soon as I lose fifty pounds of nicotine cessation I might need some more new skills.  She’s not boring even a little bit.
Psych ward:  a little piece of Heaven on Earth.  A really fat woman let me ride around in her electric wheelchair.  I became prideful, so great was my jigsaw construction acumen.  I had lots of friends and any time I wanted I could take a break from them and go back to my quiet room to pray and put pieces into the puzzle.  I did as I was told and nobody was disappointed in me.  As usual, I didn’t expect much but lots of people thought I did.
I don’t know how to talk to ‘professionals’ or to my first family; I CAN’T MAKE A CONNECTION, so I improvise.   When you talk to crazy people it doesn’t matter if you’re making sense.  It must only be SATISFYING FOR THE CRAZY-FOLK.  That’s what I’ve learned about my life of subservience to crazy demanding people who don’t care to evolve.  And their friends.

Taking Apart Psychiatry: Fraud-Kings of the Mind

THERE ARE NO DEFINITIVE LABORATORY TESTS FOR ANY SO-CALLED MENTAL DISORDER.

And along with that:

ALL SO-CALLED MENTAL DISORDERS ARE CONCOCTED, NAMED, LABELED, DESCRIBED, AND CATEGORIZED by a committee of psychiatrists, from menus of human behaviors.

See more here:

9:26 am

THE MICROWAVE SCREAM INSIDE YOUR SKULL

The U.S. military bankrolled early development of a non-lethal microwave weapon that creates sound inside your head. But in the end, the gadget may be just as likely to wind up in shopping malls as on battlefields, as I report inNew Scientist.

The project is known as MEDUSA – a contrived acronym for Mob Excess Deterrent Using Silent Audio. And it should not be confused with the Long Range Acoustic Device and similar gadgets which simply project sound. This one uses the so-called “microwave auditory effect”: a beam of microwaves is turned into sound by the interaction with your head. Nobody else can hear it unless they are in the beam as well.

Learn more here — http://www.wired.com/2008/07/the-microwave-s/

Dissociation

It’s a terrible thing to know your life is beautiful yet be unable to feel it.  I’ve prayed every day that God would change me and make me able to tolerate pain and to thank him for what happened to me.  I kept expecting him to fill me with joy that stopped the synthetic pain and torment.  I’ll know myself to BE HAPPY, like yesterday in the car in a blizzard with my sons.  I was genuinely happy but my sense of happy gets repeatedly blocked.  I want to love properly and I’ve begged for divine love.  I believed in it too.

Ross Rosenberg-Lisa A. Romano Discuss Dissociation-Feeling Unworthy

9:00 am
Isaac says you can’t eliminate an ill by focusing on it. Like, a coalition-against-something is bound to create more of whatever.  He told me that the church is an organization focussed on sin.  Especially the Baptists, but all the denominations need their flock to be ever mindful of individual sin and personal culpability.  They depend on repeat business and if a convert ever actually grew up it would decimate their business model.
I didn’t think I could be more skittery and panicked but I’m really struggling now.  I’ll be perfectly content (for like a MINUTE) and then my emotions are struck a blow from parts unknown.  INSTANT changes to my emotional state, even when I’ve been fully cognizant of the thought-flow.  Over and over, around and around, day and night, I pull my thoughts into alignment so I don’t vomit or pass out.  Metacognition is what I’ve studied over the past years since I’ve known about directed energy weapons and remote mind-control.  I worked on my mind before that but it wasn’t so crucial.  I don’t know where to go from here.  My spiritual practices have diminished and I rarely enter worship.  I’ve begun to doubt Jesus.  All these years of torture I knew he’d do amazing things for me.  I don’t feel that way anymore.  I pray for him to maintain my faith when I can’t.  I need a change VERY MUCH.  I’d love to be in Toronto so I could go to the church I love.  I’d love for Josh to go to Toronto too.  I’d love for Isaac to not have to worry about us anymore.  I’d love for my dad to pay what he owes me for years of prayers and servitude and jestering.  I gave that man no end of jollies.  He knows what I mean, and so do the narcissistic-abuse-counselors who describe my childhood every day.   I’m really at the end of me.  Targeted Individuals die all the time.  No big deal.  Except it is TO GOD.
“I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me.” 
2/29/16
9:11 am
I’m so disappointed in Jesus.  I serve the prince of peace and I have to take medication for anxiety.  I have trusted since 2006 that He would use me in some fashion.  I trusted Him to make me well since I was attacked in 2009.  I’ve been waiting for Him to fix everything, and to accept my offering.  I’m ready to explode, it seems.  I cycle with hopelessness.  Every few minutes I’m made to see something as very threatening.  I pray about it but it doesn’t stop and I’ve been expecting it to stop for many years.  I haven’t heard from Jesus for a while and I have a hard time believing things he’s said.  I feel pointless and distraught.  I wish Jesus wold fix me pretty quick.  I am sluggish on the medication; I stammer and I shuffle.  I don’t think a servant of the Most High God should behave that way.  God says He’s never late.  I’m running down and I can hardly believe in Him.  That’s what the drugs are for.  I wonder what would be late? God says He’s never late and I’ve been waiting for Him since I was attacked in 2009.  The only reason I was targeted is because I obeyed Him.  I used to think He had great plans for me.  Now I hope I don’t die from anxiety and paranoia.  I can hardly stand having nothing to do.  I really need to go some place.  Just a couple thousand dollars would change my life.  Isaac thinks I should go to a spiritual-healing campus for a while.  I sure wish I could afford to do that.

2/28/16

6:56 pm

TORTURE via

ELECTRONIC NANOBOTS / FIGHT in the SPIRIT for THEM!!!

2/27/16

6:37 am

6:25 am

NY Times Reporter Murdered in Dominican Republic Spoke about Psychotronic Warfare and MK-ULTRA

In her article, Ms. Kershaw wrote that people who felt they were being targeted had found the support of Missouri Representative Jim Guest, who told the Times: “I’ve had enough calls, some from credible people — professors — being targeted by nonlethal weapons. They become psychologically affected by it. They have trouble sleeping at night.”
When Ms. Kershaw wrote her article, psychotronic warfare was not legal against US citizens, but that all changed with the National Defense Authorization Act 2013.
See more:

http://www.abreureport.com/2016/02/ny-times-reporter-murdered-in-dominican.html

The Revolution of Freedom is Taking Place in Your Mind

Suppose They Gave a War and Nobody Came (old film). The pioneers of the warless world are the youth who refuse military service (Einstein). To change something, build a new model that makes the existing one obsolete (Buckminster Fuller).
We’ll have the political solution when no one pays attention to politics. Ultimately, when enough people in believe in freedom, you can literally ignore an Empire out of existence. We ignore your laws, we ignore your taxes, we don’t care what you think … I own myself, my neighbor owns himself, and we get along like adult human beings.

What Narcissists Want for You

2/26/16

6:32 am

Covert Transhumanism; A Mind Control Documentary

This is pretty important:

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